Let's play a game.
If you have a child or children, I want you to imagine them doing the following...
Going onto a blog to trash other kids in the school they don't like. Calling them hurtful names. Exposing them to ridicule. Encouraging others to pile on.
If you don't have kids, imagine that your significant other or sister or brother is doing the same thing.
Would you cheer them on? Or would you be disapproving and get them to stop?
There's so much media focus on cyberbullying now. Kids have been harassed into suicide. No one is saying it's a good thing. Funny how there isn't the same sympathy for adult victims of cyberbullies.
Cyberharassment, cyberstalking and cyberbullying. Publishing people's personal information against their will so that they can be the target of cyberharassment, cyberstalking and cyberbullying - it's WRONG. Kids may not know any better.
What's an adult's excuse?
19 comments:
In one of her many blogs (how does she keep up?!), Donna Lehtonen posted that she has a son, and even said what his name is.
He apparently posted on the internet that he wants to get out of Canada. Why is that so? Is he being bullied? Is he popular in school? Is he picked on because he is not native Canadian? How would you feel if YOUR own son becomes a victim of cyberbullying? There is karma, you know ...
What if one day, he decides to search on the internet to see if any of his schoolmates have posted about him (the way you go about digging information about the tpfers you don't like) and discovers your multiple blogs (apparent in cache) and discovers this blog?
Consequences ... can ... be ... damaging ... Mother being the bully?
There's absolutely NO excuse for bullying, whether it's internet or playground bullying, just no excuse. Full stop! I do think the publishing of private information should not be permitted whoever it relates to, as it doesn't serve a purpose, IMO, it's just gossip. However, whilst I have found the PF to be an invaluable source of information, whether you are a fan or not, bullying DOES happen on there. Just because moderators claim they don't tolerate it, it does happen both openly and behind the scenes. You only have to look at the Belen Echandia forum, hence the need for an alternative on the PFA.
I've heard that several people have filed criminal complaints with the authorities for stalking and harassment. These two think they can hide behind addresses in Spain and Canada, but they really cannot.
To the commenter at 10:08 a.m., we aren't familiar enough with the forums to know. If you think bullying is going, speak out where it makes a diffence and where your words can have an impact - on the actual PF site. What we object to on PFA is that everyone is a target - people who post in support of PFA, people who seem to have nice bags or cars or lives, people who have done nothing wrong to anyone. It's venting. But pointless venting, in our opinion.
Quote "I've heard that several people have filed criminal complaints with the authorities for stalking and harassment. These two think they can hide behind addresses in Spain and Canada, but they really cannot"
I await judgement day. Michael Tonello probably has so little anyway, and can't possibly lose much.
Donna Lehtonen ... from all the stuff that she has blogged about ... I can't quite say the same. You have your address used by Michael Tonello?! Gosh.
I hope they all have enough reserves from their very own bag fund to fight the court cases.
I had hoped that PFA was going to be more than just a bitch fest venting blog. And I thought it is growing pain and give them some time to grow. But the Priscilla and Sakara post did it for me. I mean, come on, how many times can you say cut them some slack next time will be better. But to be fair, PFA had done some good expose, when they got their facts straight and did a bit of homework. And they don't censor comments posted. I think those are good things. Pity there are just too much shit piled on top of them....
To the commenter at 6:41 ... how do you know they got their facts straight?? And WHAT expose?
On the one hand, they said you can't authenticate bags from pictures. And then called out photographed bags as fake. Doesn't make sense.
They claimed people were reselling - where was the proof AND WHY IS THIS WRONG???
What precisely was exposed other than people's personal info? If people wanted that info made public on forums, they would make it public themselves.
and to 6:41pm
How do you know they didn't censor comments? I know for a fact they didn't allow a fair amount of comments through in an effort to control the overall tone of the blog. That is not fair nor did they have their facts straight.
I do respect your opinion though and it's nice to have a place to speak freely without be called "fat, bitch or skank" when voicing an opinion.
To the person who wrote at 6:41: Cyber-stalking has taken place at PFA. A number of individuals had their privacy targeted just because they were members of tpf. By participating in PFA, you were also a part of all that. If that is your idea of an "exposé" then you need serious help.
Anonymous at 10:08;
There has been no more drama or bullying in the BE sf than there has been on any other sf on TPF. There's the same type of behavior in the Chanel, Hermes, LV, Coach, HH and RM sf's, and probably others I haven't mentioned. The past problems of the BE sf isn't an isolated issue. There's no point in singling out one when it happens in most of the others as well. If there is no excuse for cyber bullying then PFA is not a necessity. It existed for the sole purpose of bullying and harassing members, mods and the owners of TPF. Bullying someone under the shroud of 'anonymous' is cowardly. I see no purpose for such a place.
I am 6.41 pm - Their posts about IFFAH and Dinitegrity. It makes me more aware of potential bad apples in PF. As you said yourself, buyer beware right?
Why do you harrass innocent people, PFA? What have these innocent people done to you?! They don't live in your neighborhoods nor your countries.
Calling out tpfers' bags as fakes ... YOU have no clue. So let's just say you are right, one or two of them have counterfeits. SO? You went around saying other bag collectors' collections are all fake ... You have a serious obsession to ridicule people who have more than you. Show the proof that they are!
You are stupid to think that Hermes doesn't know what you have done. But you're the sucker still parting your money with your store ... and them laughing behind your back. Why not look back into your store through the glass window after you leave to see if they are sniggering about you?
Re the posters dinitegrity and Iffah. We went back and looked. Seems Iffah was caught in a lie. And seems dinitegrity might be a reseller. So "buyer beware" exactly how? If you don't like what they post on PF, post something in rebuttal. Why is it some big scam? Why not expose the lies on Match.Com - you think everyone is honest there? Or on Ebay, where shady sellers mean that you actually have skin in the game - and stand to lose $$$.
To the PFAE @ 6.16pm Unfortunately, a while back the Admin tried their utmost, and I do believe that, to stop the BS on there, that forum was constantly getting warnings. When someone had a quality issue, a criticism, or questioned the designers practices or policies, they were subject to attack, not just by members, but by the designer themself! In addition, the designer woud actually contact the person complaining, and ask them to refrain from posting their opinions on the forum!
This for some left a bad taste, thus using the PFA as an alternative. The very fact that there have been over 300 posts, and many, many posters singing the same tune was indicative that all was not right. I just wanted to show it from a different perspective, and not everyone who posts is anti PF. Having said that, IMO, it's important to keep an open mind about everything.
Quote: "When someone had a quality issue, a criticism, or questioned the designers practices or policies, they were subject to attack, not just by members, but by the designer themself! In addition, the designer woud actually contact the person complaining, and ask them to refrain from posting their opinions on the forum!"
This I understand and agree with. I haven't seen members doing this any longer mostly because I think many of the more 'vocal' posters have moved on. It's very unfortunate though that a place like PFA has to be the alternate when a sf of TPF doesn't allow everyone's opinions to be expressed. PFA is so foul, I just hate to see them get any traffic there.
6.41 april 6 again here - I no longer go to PFA because it is full of rubbish, but initially went there to try to get some info when I felt something was not all right with some people on PF. Yes IFFAH was caught in a lie and dinitegrity is active in a replica forum. Buyer beware how? The term "buyer" here is obviously not to be taken literally. I simply meant that nothing is as they appear to be, like people in match.com as you rightly point out, and it is good to know. Please don't talk to me like I participated in or cheering on the mudslingings that is happening in PFA. Your reaction to my post ignored the fact that I am no follower of anyone. I am simply exercising what you have pointed out as the wise thing to do for all of us who are trying to find resources online. Like going to toolhaus for Ebay. Or reading your blog as we read PFA. Or read PFA as we read PF. Like PFA, your reaction to my post was not very impartial. I expected that from them. But I must I was hoping for something better here...
Quote:
6.41 april 6 again here - I no longer go to PFA because it is full of rubbish, but initially went there to try to get some info when I felt something was not all right with some people on PF. Yes IFFAH was caught in a lie and dinitegrity is active in a replica forum. Buyer beware how? The term "buyer" here is obviously not to be taken literally. I simply meant that nothing is as they appear to be, like people in match.com as you rightly point out, and it is good to know. Please don't talk to me like I participated in or cheering on the mudslingings that is happening in PFA. Your reaction to my post ignored the fact that I am no follower of anyone. I am simply exercising what you have pointed out as the wise thing to do for all of us who are trying to find resources online. Like going to toolhaus for Ebay. Or reading your blog as we read PFA. Or read PFA as we read PF. Like PFA, your reaction to my post was not very impartial. I expected that from them. But I must I was hoping for something better here...
As a bystander, I don't think you were nasty, and I don't think the responder was nasty to you. You two may disagree, but there was no name-calling and no hate speech. I don't see what reaction you're referring to, other than simply a quick disagreement.
And a lot of us who have been repeatedly stalked for FOUR YEARS would disagree with your assessment of this site. Considering how frantic so many of us were for so long, yes, there will be some bitching, but there is also revealing information, pooling insights into these sociopaths' characters, and limits as to the random insults like fat, skanky, or bitch. That's a huge difference in the two sites.
YMMV, but I would vote for letting the victims vent for awhile. If it continues with no sign of stopping, then maybe intervene, but otherwise, please allow a period of decompression.
As near as I can tell, these "ventings" are coming from people who are just now discovering that this blog exists, and they are enormously relieved that they aren't alone in their objections to Michael's and Donna's stalking and hate. So let the place evolve before writing it off and dismissing it as another TPFA.
'This I understand and agree with. I haven't seen members doing this any longer mostly because I think many of the more 'vocal' posters have moved on. It's very unfortunate though that a place like PFA has to be the alternate when a sf of TPF doesn't allow everyone's opinions to be expressed. PFA is so foul, I just hate to see them get any traffic there.'
April 7, 2011 9:45 AM
Thanks for your response. It IS unfortunate that the PF is not used for it's intended purpose. IMO the threads on the PFA were plain sailing, people expressed themselves freely, until the same people that tried to silence members
on the PF began attacking there aswell! There is no justification for it whatsoever.
Whilst I do read the PFA, my main issue is the ACCURATE 'reporting' of topics, that are not backed up by proof, ie; fake bags. I'm all for exposing any dodgy stuff, but there is a line that should not be crossed. At the moment I am asking myself whether I want to even read ANY of these forums and blogs, as I feel they have shown to be quite destructive and hurtful to some.
Anonymous said...
Quote "I've heard that several people have filed criminal complaints with the authorities for stalking and harassment. These two think they can hide behind addresses in Spain and Canada, but they really cannot"
WHO are these people who have filed criminal complaints? And why have they not been acted on? Could it all just be a myth? Some fabrication?
Why not post the actual threatening emails from MT? I've yet to see even one!
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